Slowing Down

It was a Tuesday evening when I left the nursing home where I was visiting, on my way to a 7 PM Mass. I wanted to be there in good time, so I was speeding through a very quiet neighborhood. That's when I saw the blue lights flashing behind me. "Oh, no," I thought. "I don't need this."

free image from Unsplash

I pulled over. By the time the policeman came to my car, I already had my license ready to hand to him. "I might have been going too fast," I said. I told him I was on my way to church and didn't want to be late.

"Let me see your insurance and registration," he said.

I fumbled through the glove compartment that's become something of a waste basket. Lots of coupons in there, a few masks, car repair receipts, and a pile of insurance renewal papers. Without my reading glasses, and in the dark, I hardly knew what I was looking at. My registration must be in there somewhere!

I'm panicking and fumbling through the papers when the policeman, still holding my license, said, "You find what you are looking for and I'll be back."

I may have found the current registration, I'm not sure. I started to hand him a pile of papers and said, "Maybe you can find what you need to see."

He asked, "Did you ever get caught for speeding before?"

"No..., but there was that one time I was stopped for turning right, but that was years ago..." I am clearly flustered.

"Listen," he said. "It's easy to get zoned out on this street. I'm going to give you a warning. I'll give you a verbal warning." 

I thanked him and promised to clean out the glove compartment.

Ever since then, I've been driving at or under the limit. In fact, I realize I may have been speeding a lot. Now I find I kind of like the slower pace. (I can even get in an extra decade of the Rosary on some of my trips.)

So today I am driving on a local road near home. It's dark and it's clear sailing. I would usually step on it, but I kept my speed at the limit. THEN, a truck from a side road pulls out in front of me! I slam on the brakes and we avoided one another. Whew! I immediately thought, what if I were going even a little faster - there could've been a collision! I am grateful for Divine Providence.

Thank you, Jesus, for always being with us, for going before us and preparing the way. Thank you for your protection. Thank you for your goodness. Thank you, Father for the Guardian Angels you send us.
And thank you that I didn't get a ticket.

Keep on Keeping On

He was nervous. He was scared. Our nine-year-old grandson's ice hockey team was chosen to play during the intermission of a professional hockey team game! He's the goalie.

The day finally arrived. He left school early. His classmates were at the window, waving and cheering him on. He and his parents then took the train to get to the arena.

There were thousands of people there. From the bleachers, he watched his first professional game. Then it was time. He left his parents for the locker room to put on his gear. 

When he skated onto the ice, his name flashed on the screen for everyone to see. The crowd cheered.

And he played.

When it was over, he went back to the locker room to remove his gear, then ran to the stands into the arms of his mother. He did it! And he was so very proud. He stayed in her lap and hugged and hugged and kept hugging her. He was so relieved, so happy, so excited.

"Remember when you were learning to skate?" she said. "And you kept falling, and how discouraged you felt? You kept going. Look how far you've come! You are skating in the arena of a multi-million dollar franchise!"

I keep thinking about our young grandson in his mother's lap. It leads me to reflect on my life, and how my times I've fallen and become discouraged, sometimes thinking, "How can I do this? How can I keep going on?" And somehow the grace is there for me to continue and experience little successes along the way.

Like our grandson watching the professionals, I witness the example of so many others whose lives demonstrate commitment and perseverance. They inspire me.

At the end of my life in this world, I hope the saints will be cheering me on, and that I can run into the arms of Our Father with relief, excitement, and everlasting joy - secure in His arms. And I long to hear him say, after all the times I've fallen short:
 

"Well done, good and faithful servant,... Enter into the joy of your Lord." (Matthew 25:23)

Slow Fasting

I lost the charger to my Versa 3 fitbit. I've looked everywhere I think it could be. I use my fitbit often to check the time, to record my fitness activities, to track my sleep. I even have an app on it to find my phone. Now I'm unable to use my fitbit because I am without the charger. I really miss it. I have come to depend on it as part of my daily routine.

This brought to mind what I recently heard in a teaching about fasting. When we fast, we abstain or deny ourselves, for example from food or some comfort. It's a penance because it is hard to do and it is a discipline because we use will power. But more than penance or discipline, fasting is about relationship. For the Christian, it is about a relationship with Jesus.

Our ultimate fulfillment is in and with Jesus. 1 Corinthians 1:9 states that we are called to be in fellowship with him, a personal relationship. Fasting can help us grow in this relationship.

We are meant to be fulfilled. When I feel cold, I might grab for a blanket. When I'm hungry, I'll look for a snack. If I get a headache, I'll take an aspirin. I want to feel comfortable and satisfied. When I am totally satisfied, I have no needs. Without needs, I am not as apt to turn to Jesus (who asked us to pray for our daily bread, Matt 6:11). Our needs direct us to call upon him, to depend upon him.

Fasting, then, is a choice to feel our hunger or discomfort, then to turn to Jesus, asking him to meet us in that experience. It's about developing a deeply personal relationship with Jesus. It's creating a space in our lives to make room for him. 

It may be a favorite TV show, or phone scrolling that occupies our time. To give that up is a kind of fasting that creates a space where we can choose to be with Jesus in prayer. 

In the teaching I heard, it was recommended to go slowly - to take "baby steps" in fasting. It's about the relationship. Once we turn to Jesus in our deprivation and begin to experience the intimacy of being with him, this creates a desire for even more. Only then may we want to take on more fasting or penances, as the Holy Spirit leads.

This is the beginning of Lent, and Lent is a journey. Every journey begins with one first step. May our fasting this Lenten season bring us ever more close to Jesus our Savior. 

So when I go to check my fitbit, I realize that now it is not on my wrist. I feel the loss. May those moments become times of thanking the Lord for the gift of time, of physical fitness, of restful sleep, of growing closer to him.

When my fitbit is fully charged, I'm thinking of choosing not to wear it, perhaps one day a week, and develop the habit - not so much checking my fitbit so often, but checking in with Jesus.

Update: The charger is found. Praise God!

"To Forgive is Divine"

Mother Angelica once said, "It's hard to pray for someone when you hope they'll slip on a banana peel." I thought of this quote today in church during the homily on forgiveness.

Forgiveness is likewise a theme of Jubilee Year 2025.

"I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you." Matthew 5:44

  

And so I consider:
Who is my enemy?
Is there anyone in my life towards whom I feel resentment?
Has anyone who caused me harm for which I am still hurting?

Has anyone been hostile or angry toward me?
Has anyone cursed me?

Have I been mistreated or abused? 

 
These are questions to bring to prayer. Some people or situations may quickly come to mind. Others may be deeply hidden in memories.

Forgiveness may often be first a decision of the mind and will, and then of the heart. Perhaps begin by simply saying aloud:

"I forgive _________ for __________."
"Lord, help me to forgive _________."

And:
"Lord, I release _________ into your loving, merciful care."

"Holy Spirit, how do you want me to pray for __________?"
"Lord, is there any way You want me to extend kindness toward _________?

 

We may need to forgive over and over again. Each time, forgiveness can become a deeper and ever more freeing experience so we no longer have to carry the burdens of resentment and bitterness toward others. 

I've told my kids, "When someone is mean to you, that's an opportunity to forgive." Much easier said than done. With God's grace, however, it is possible.

  

"Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." Ephesians 4:32

Jubilee 2025

This is the "Pilgrims of Hope" Jubilee year. This year, ending on Epiphany 2026, is a time of special grace. It is a time to be open to receive all that our merciful Lord has for us this year and to pray with the church for God's favor upon us and on the whole world.

 Fr. Mark-Mary Ames, CFR gives an historical background.

  

  

In the Old Testament there were four central features of Jubilee: slaves were set free, debts were forgiven, people returned home, and there was time for rest and recreation. These features can be a guide on how to enter into and experience Jubilee in our own lives.

To what am I enslaved? What are those habitual sins, addictions, distractions that keep me from being truly free? What is it that keeps frustrating or annoying me? These are the encumbrances I need to bring to the Lord. Ask to walk in greater freedom. Be set free and rejoice.

Forgiveness of debt. Am I holding on to grudges and resentments toward those who have hurt me? Ask the Lord, "Whom do I still need to forgive?" Maybe a parent? A brother or sister? Or even an organization of some kind by whom I may have been unfairly treated? Ask for an extra measure of grace to forgive, to let go, to be healed. Forgive and rejoice.

 

Come home. Jubilee is time to connect more deeply to God as our Father and to one another as sisters and brothers. How can I strengthen those bonds? In the Old Testament people returned to the temple. How can I return to the church to more actively worship, to more actively participate in fellowship and ministry? Be with the family of God and rejoice.

 

Finally, rest and recreation. In Old Testament times during Jubilee people did not travel away from home and they did not engage in work. Even the lands were not tilled to be allowed "to rest." For sure, in our busy lives we need rest. How can we enter into rest to be recharged and renewed? Maybe it means taking breaks from social media, or from TV programs, or from scrolling our phones. Maybe it means purposely planning for a Sabbath/Sunday day of rest from weekly activities. (Even God rested on the seventh day of creation. Gen 2:2.) How can I use this space in my schedule for healthy leisure time? Rest and rejoice.

The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops has a helpful resource for Jubilee 2025.

“Open our souls to the working of the Holy Spirit, that he may soften the hardness of our hearts, that enemies may speak to each other again, adversaries may join hands,
and peoples seek to meet together.” Pope Francis

                                 

The Name of Jesus

Today in the liturgical year of the Church we honor in a particular way the name of Jesus. 

I was driving home and heard this on the radio. What an  appropriate and encouraging song for the beginning of the new year!

Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ

 is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:9-11
 

January 1, 2025

It's January 1, and on this day each year I usually look forward with high anticipation for new adventures, goals to achieve, places to see, things to do and learn. This year, not so much. There are wars in Ukraine, the Middle East, and other places that go on and on and on. Our country is politically painfully divided. A family member is coping with health challenges. 2025 looks to be a very sobering year. So this may be the year it is especially important to find light in the darkness, hope in difficulties, gratitude for blessings.

On social media someone posted about a "Gratitude Jar." The idea is that at the end of each month, reflect on and write down the very best thing that happened. It may be something from one's personal life or even a world event. Write it down on a slip of paper and place it into the jar. At the end of the year read everything that was written and give thanks for the blessings of the year. I am thinking this could be not only a personal project, but one for the family - a wonderful way to celebrate the end of the year and look forward to the one about to begin.

Photo by Kier in Sight Archives on Unsplash

“For all that has been, Thanks. To all that shall be, Yes.”
Former U.N. Secretary General Dag Hammarskjöld